Scene #9 - Din bhar baithe rehte ho aur pachchees jhooth humse bulwate ho
At Soorma Bhopali's place.
Villager:
Un dono ne bhaagne ki koshish to kee hogi na.
Soorma Bhopali:
Arre koshish! Aisi waisi koshish? Jaan-tod koshish kari. Magar main bhaagne doon tab na. Ek ko dee maine patkhari. Ke woh lambu nikla bhaagne ko. Maine pakadke taang jo khend diye ke jaate kidhar ho aap. Aur kas ke do diye lafade ke chalo thane. Bas phir kya tha? Pair pakad liye dono ne.
Villager:
Veeru aur Jai ne tumhare pair pakad liye?
Soorma Bhopali:
Haan haan.
Villager:
Maine to suna bade badmash hain woh.
Soorma Bhopali:
Arre. Bot badmaash hain magar hamara naam bhi Soorma Bhopali aise hi nahin hai. Ab aap samjho ki pair pakadke dono ro diye...
Veeru and Jai come and stand behind Soorma.
Soorma Bhopali:
...ke Soorma bhai maaf kar do. Woh to main maaf kar deta. Magar mujhe is baat par gussa ki mere ilaake mein aa kaise gaye.
Jaidev:
Phir kya hua?
Soorma Bhopali:
Arre hona kya tha? Main to ishtick rakhta hoon. Ab jo maine finfinayi yeh, to sutayi kar dee. Satasat, Satasat. Bot maara, bot maaaaraaah.
Veeru:
Phir kya hua?
Soorma Bhopali:
Basss..phir hona kya tha? Maine dono ke pakadke galebaaan. Aur maine kaha.
Catches Veeru and Jai by collar and drags and then sees their faces.
Veeru:
Kya kaha?
Soorma Bhopali:
Kya kaha! Haaay. Kya kaha maine? Haan maine kaha ki aur koi khidmat ho mere layak to batao mujhe.
Addressing junta.
Soorma Bhopali:
Arre miyaan aap logon ko aur koi kaam hai ke nahin? Din bhar baithe rehte ho aur pachchees jhooth humse bulwate ho! Chalo Khaan, kaam karo. Arre jao bhayya jabran jhoomte rehte ho, jaao.
Addressing Jai and Veeru again.
Soorma Bhopali:
Heeen. Heenheen. Main to aise hi mazak kar riya tha. Aur Khaan! Bot jaldi aap logon ki choot ho gayi jail se. Vaise maasha allah sehatein mehatein to bade maze ki kara leen, tan tan ho rahi hai.
Jaidev:
Soorma Bhai.
Soorma Bhopali:
Haan bhai?
Jaidev:
Hum apne hazar rupaye lene aaye hain.
Soorma Bhopali:
Hazar rupaye?!
Veeru:
Haan haan hazar rupaye.
Soorma Bhopali:
Achcha haan, hazar rupaye. Arre woh to aapki giraftari ke doosre hi din mil gaye the. Woh din hai aur aajka din hai. Lifafe mein bharke jeb mein dhare dhare phir riya hoon. Yeh dekho. Sau sau ke das hain, gin lo.