Sholay
Scene #15 - James Bond ke pote hain yeh
Basanti in a mango orchard. Throws a stone on a bunch of three mangoes. None falls down. Notices one more. Jumps twice but finds it out of reach. One bullet is fired and the mango falls on ground. Enters Veeru.
Basanti:
Arre yunki tum yahan kaise?
Veeru:
Yunki. yunhi. Bolo kaunsa aam todna hai?
Basanti:
Jo main aam bolun tum goli maarke tod sakte ho?
Veeru:
Yeh hamare baanye haath ka khel hai.
Shifts the revolver to his left hand.
Veeru:
Bade bade nishanebaaz hamare pair choote hain aur kehte hain Veeru, tumhare jaisa nishanebaaz paida nahin hua.
Basanti:
Tum to bade nishanchi lagte ho.
Jaidev:
Haan, James Bond ke pote hain yeh.
Basanti:
Yunki, kaun hain?
Veeru:
Are ise to aisehi badbad karne ki aadat hai. Haan to batao kaunsa aam todun?
Basanti:
Uhhh. Uhhh. Ek woh.
Veeru:
Hmmm.
Basanti:
Uhhh... ek yeh.
Veeru:
Hmmm.
Basanti:
Aur ek yeh.
Veeru:
Huhhh.
Basanti:
Hmmmm.
Veeru uses his saliva to moisten his fingers and gets ready to shoot. Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Four mangoes fall on ground. Veeru is surprised. Jai clears off the smoke from his revolver and goes back to sleep.
Basanti:
Uhhh. Arre yeh to tumhara dost bhi.
Veeru:
Hmmm. Uhhh. Haaan haan haan. Kaafi hoshiyaar hai ladka. Abhi main sikha raha hoon. Jaldi seekh jayega.
Basanti:
Uhhh. Tum mujhe bhi sikha sakte ho?
Veeru:
Haan kyun nahin! Tumhe bhi sikha sakta hoon. Tumhe to main do dodod do din mein sikha sakta hoon.
Basanti:
Do din mein sikhaoge?
Veeru:
Haaan.
Jaidev:
Bahuton ko to inhone do ghante mein sikha diya hai.
Basanti:
Do ghante mein?
Veeru:
Arre iski to aadat hai bakbak karne ki. Tumhe pistol chalana seekhna hai to idhar aao, aao aao. Aaa woh. woh aam nazar aa raha hai? Aa raha hai na?
Basanti:
Haaan haan.
Veeru:
Haan. Ab pakdo pistol. Pakdo. Aur yeh haath aise aise aise yahan, aur yeh ungli yahan.
Basanti:
Haan.
Veeru:
Haan. Aur ab aankhein band kar lo.
Jaidev:
Maine to aankh pehle hi band kar rakhi hai.
Basanti:
Yunki yeh kya keh raha hai?
Veeru:
Iski to aadat hai bakbak karne ki. Tum aakhein band kar lo. Band kee? Ab. dekho woh aam nazar aa raha hai?
Basanti:
Huuuh. Yunki ajeeb baat kahi tumne. Aankhein band karke aam dikhayi deta hai kya?
Veeru:
Tumne kya dono aankhein band kar lee?
Basanti:
Haan.
Veeru:
Dono nahin baanyi aankh. Yeh aankh. Yeh aankh. Band karo. Aur doosri aankh se nishana baandho.
Basanti:
Ummm uhuh. Ab?
Veeru:
Ab.
Holds her from behind.
Veeru:
Ab. Ab goli chala do.
Bang! They both fall down. Veeru is all over Basanti.
Basanti:
Aaaah!
Veeru:
Bhhebehbkhb!!!!
Jaidev:
Lag gaya nishana.
Basanti:
Yunki hum seekh to rahe the goli chalana, lekin ab hamein daal mein kuch kaala lag raha hai.
Veeru:
Daal? Kaala? Kaali daal? mmm.mm..main samjha nahin.
Basanti:
Magar main samajh gayi. Yeh tum seher ke log samajhte ho ki hum gaaonwalon ko akal to hai nahin. Lekin Basanti tum jaison ko taange mein bithake gaon ke chaar chakkar lagake tasion tak chorke aayegi haan.
Veeru:
Basanti main tumhe pistol chalana sikha raha tha, tum mujhe gg.g.g.g..galat samajh rahi ho.
Basanti:
Main achchi tarah samajhti hoon, achchi tarah samajhti hoon. Ab tum yahan baithkar chalao pistol, Basanti chali apne ghar. Jai raam ji ki.
Throws his right shoe at Jai.